Never Again The Same
by Brenda1257
Summary: This story follows the TOS episode, "Plato's Stepchildren" Kirk finds that he is attracted to Nyota Uhura and cannot get her or that kiss out of his mind!
1. Chapter 1 Attraction

Kirk looked up from his chair wondering what he could do to return things back to normal. Nothing was the same since being on that planet.

It had been several weeks since the incident with Parmen and the Platonians, when their bodies had been taken control of. He did not want to think about it. It was disturbing just to recall his humiliation.

He found himself stealing glances at Uhura whenever he got a chance. James T. Kirk was no stranger to women, he had plenty of them. This time though, things were different. He knew that he could not use his charm or his sex appeal to get what he wanted. Did he want her? Yes...he had to admit to himself that he did.

What bothered him most though, was his response to kissing Uhura. He had never thought of her before as anything but a very capable Communications Officer. After all, she was crew and he had a policy that he didn't do crew. He had never even thought about her in that way before, but the kiss had changed all that. It had been unexpectedly arousing.

He still remembered the scent of her. He had never been quite that close to her before. Now when he looked at her hands working at her console, he remembered the feel of those same hands on his face when they kissed. He remembered the curve of her waist and the roundness of her hips and how they felt as his hands, though guided by another ran over them. Those feelings burned in his memory. He thought of it as he secretly watched the swaying of her hips, those rare occasions when she moved about the bridge. He had begun stealing glances of her whenever he could.

Even though he had not been in control of those touches and he knew that he was not responsible for his actions, he had responded to her in a way that surprised him. There was electricity that he felt pass between them that had nothing to do with the forcing of the kiss. He had never imagined what it would be like to taste her full soft lips or to feel the soft curves of her body so close to his. After all, she was Uhura. She was a beautiful woman, but he had never thought about that before and now he asked himself, why had he not.? It had not been altogether unpleasant, that forced kiss. He felt himself become aroused and was surprised at the desire that filled him. He knew that she felt him hard and aroused as he kissed her. He had seen it in her eyes. It disturbed him now to think about it. He remembered looking at Parman defiantly, while kissing her, but his body had been just as defiant, going against his own mind by aching to join with hers. He had been so close to her, her scent and taste forever in his memory.

She had expressed her fear to him, when they were the puppets of the platonians, and he had tried to reassure her. He tried to concentrate on being the captain and being strong for his crew...and for her. When he had felt the pressure forcing him to connect with the fullness of her lips, their softness beckoned him for further exploration.

Since the incident, she had been stiff towards him and unfailingly polite. She hardly looked him in the eye. The admiration he used to see on her face was nowhere to be found. The easy familiar camraderie between them no longer existed. He was grieved by it all.

"Lieutenant" he said daring not to look over at her.

"Yes Captain."

He turned around in the captain's chair. "I need to see you in conference room three." He looked up at Spock who was watching him "Spock, you have the con."

He got up and walked out knowing that she was following close behind.

**************************

Uhura sat in the conference room wondering what the captain was going to say. She was nervous and she knew that the crew most likely was buzzing about it while they were gone.

He was watching her as if he was trying to choose his words carefully.

"Lieutenant, I can't help but notice that things have been strained between us recently. I think we need to vent, to air out our feelings or whatever so that things can return to normal between you and I."

She should have known he would be direct. She looked at him trying to remain calm, but her heart felt like it would beat out of her chest. "Captain, how can things be normal? Things...will never again be the same. I am just trying to function here. Am I not fulfilling my duties satisfactorily?"

"Of course you are. I just mean...perhaps you want to talk about it."

"We've already talked about it when we returned. Dr. McCoy-"

"I'm not talking about that, dammit!" he said obviously frustrated. "I'm talking about what happened...between you and I...the part that wasn't...'forced.'

She did not want to talk about this. She would have to admit to him how she liked the fact that he recognized her as a woman and that his obvious arousal as he held her in his arms while they were captives on the planet excited her.

"I don't know what you mean" she lied avoiding his gaze.

He stood up coming into her personal space. He stared at her a moment before pulling her by her arms to her feet. "Oh I think you do, Uhura. I think you do. I have been consumed with thoughts about what happened and how I felt. I have not been able to think of little else in the last few weeks. Are you being honest with me and telling me that you felt nothing? Are you trying to tell me that you have not even thought about it?"

She did not respond. Instead she looked away. He was too handsome and sexy for his own damn good! His hands held her arms tightly as he was searching her for answers she did not want to give. She felt weak and hot at the same time. The faint smell of his cologne wrecking havoc on her senses.

"Answer me, Lieutenant!" he hissed then lowered his voice. "That's an order."

"What good will my confession do? Is this just another way for you to add a notch in your belt, just another mission another conquest?" She would not look at him, staring at the floor.

His hands released her from their tight grip and dropped to his sides. Her words stung him.

"That's not fair. You don't know me well enough to make such an assumption. I felt it when I kissed you and I want to know if you felt it too. Now that we have full control of our faculties, I need to know if it truly was real."

He pulled her into his arms and kissed her before she could object. He knew that she could report him, charge him with abuse of his authority and sexual harrasment, but he threw caution to the wind. Her lips were warm and soft and felt no resistance from her. He grasped her hips in his hands pulling her closer to him letting her feel his desire for her. He immediately felt her response.

Uhura's head was spinning and she found herself responding, kissing him back. Her hand traveled to his face during the kiss before she pulled herself away. "What did this prove, captain? I think you got what you wanted. Yes, I was affected by your kisses and it had nothing to do with them forcing us. Are you satisfied now?"

She was surprised when he sat down and ran his fingers through his hair, gathering his thoughts. "I just needed to know."

"Know what, captain? I know we both felt something, but we don't have to act on it. It may be easy for you. You find a woman to satisfy your needs in every port. I have fought to control those kinds of feelings. It's not the same for a woman. A woman who finds a man on every mission gains an unpleasant name for herself. It's not fair but its true. I had gotten myself to a place where I could control those feelings, where I wouldn't have to act on them or think on them constantly. As a woman everything I have accomplished, I've had to work hard for. No one can say some man gave me this or that because I was screwing him."

He looked at her surprised. "I never thought that way about you. I have always respected you."

"I want to remain respected, captain. Can that remain so if we act out our basic urges? If we have a quick fling and satisfy some itch, who will suffer for it? You won't be the one damaged, I will. This is why I have never ever considered getting involved with anyone I work with before, and certainly you least of all."

He looked at her. "And now?"

"It's like now you awakened the sleeping giant, the thought has been planted and I can't think of much else. I just don't want to be made a fool of...to lose all I have worked hard for."

"You said that I found a woman in every port, however, you and everyone else on this ship should also know that I don't pursue crew members. I need their respect and loyalty. This is a big risk for me also. I have never, until just now, done what I just did. I had to know even at the risk of you reporting me."

"I won't report you captain." she said meeting his gaze. " I had to know too. The question now is, where do we go from here? Do we continue to function as if it never happened?"

"I don't think I can...at least not for a while." He looked at her as if pained. " I miss the comradarie, the way all of us functioned as a well oiled machine. How do we get that back? I used to look at you as a crew member, someone loyal and competent to do a job. I can't help myself. I see a desirable woman, a woman who I long to kiss again and again."

She inhaled at his confession. "Maybe we should just take it slow...see what happens."

He stared at her a moment. "Do you want to do that? Do you want to take a chance with me?"

"I don't know. I am not into sharing and you don't seem to be into monogamy."

She was surprised at the obvious hurt that showed on his face.

"You are not being fair, Uhura."

"Maybe not, Captain, but you know I'm being truthful. Right now I feel that I'd just be the flavor of the hour and then you'd tire of me and where does that leave me? No... then again perhaps we should attempt to go on and act like it never happened."

"Yet there is a part of you that wants to give it a try?" Kirk said looking at her hopeful.

Why was he looking at her like he was a lost little boy? He was too good looking for his own good! Was he really sincere? She looked away from him.

Seeing her hesitate he moved in closer. He took her face in his hand. "Have I ever lied to you, misled you?"

"No, Captain."

"Then believe this...I want this to work. I want you. I'm tired of... as you say, 'a woman in every port'.I want more than just sex, in fact, I think we should get to know each other better. No sex...let's say for six months. We just try to get to know each other, spend time together. I want a woman who can love me, all of me the good, bad and the ugly. I want to wake up knowing her name and everything else about her. I'm willing to forgo the physical for a while and trade it for the intimate."

She looked at him doubtful. "Six months? Come on Captain. You expect me to believe that you would go six months without sex?"

"Yes, I am serious. If that's what it takes for you to believe me, then for the next six months I will pursue our relationship.. no sex with you or anyone else...though I may have to resort to other means...to keep the urges down." he said smiling at her. "And the same for you. No sex. We will proceed slowly."

She was amazed at what he was saying. If he was really serious about a relationship with her and wanted to prove it to her this way, she would take him up on it.

"Alright Captain."

"Jim"

"Alright, Jim"

He pulled her closer, looking into her eyes. "Let's seal it with a kiss"

Nyota returned the kiss which was warm and passionate. She wondered how she was going to be able to keep up her end of the bargain if all his kisses were like this one.

He released her and studied her a moment. "I should have known when we left that place, that things would never again be the same."


	2. Chapter 2 Month One

**Month One**

Kirk exited his quarters and headed for the bridge. It was now two weeks into his relationship with Uhura. He began reminiscing about the time he had spent with her the prior evening.

They had met for dinner in his quarters that previous night and he had been the perfect gentlemen. He did not want to mess this up. They had been alternating dinner dates between his quarters and hers since the beginning of their relationship. He was extra careful with her on his turf. He wanted her to feel comfortable and be able to trust him.

She had surprised him by turning up dressed in a loose fitting rust colored caftan that complimented her skin. The multicolored necklace and earrings complimented the outfit. He thought she looked like an African queen.

She had shared stories of her childhood and he had done the same. He enjoyed her company and the time went by quickly.

He escorted her back to her quarters and gave her a quick kiss goodnight. There was no need to flirt with danger.

Now entering the bridge he glanced over to her station. She looked up and smiled and continued with her duties.

He noticed Spock watching him curiously and he came over as Kirk sat down in the captain's chair.

"Captain."

"Yes, Mr. Spock."

"It appears that the atmosphere on the bridge has returned to normal. The tension between you and Lieutenant Uhura has dissipated."

"You are stating obvious facts. What is your point, Mr. Spock."

Spock raised an eyebrow. "I am merely making an observation, Captain."

Kirk did not look at him directly. "Duly noted, Mr. Spock. You may return to your post." His voice was tense.

What is it with these people? Curious stares followed him as he left his seat and walked over to Uhura's station.

"Have you received any communications from Starfleet, Lieutenant in response to my last message?" he asked looking around. Everyone's eyes were on them.

Kirk was irritated. "What are you people staring at? Get back to your duties!"

"Uh-no captain. Shall I try to contact them?" Uhura asked.

Everyone quickly averted their gaze. He exhaled and returned to his seat. "Not yet. Let's give them a little more time before we proceed."

He slumped down in his seat. If Starfleet did not respond to the request they had received from the planet Trois for medical help, they would proceed to their aid as he had already ordered.

Nyota was still somewhat skeptical of James T. Kirk, however, he was slowly putting those fears to rest. While on duty, he was still the captain and treated her as he always treated her. She was glad about this and breathed a sigh of relief.

When she was off duty, he sent her messages inquiring as to when he could see her. She received a request from him for her to meet him on the observation deck at the end of her shift.

As she prepared to meet him, she smiled to herself. He had been the perfect gentleman limiting himself to a few quick kisses. They were two weeks into their 'relationship' and he devoted at least an hour each day of his off duty time to be with her.

She arrived on the observation deck and did not see him. Obviously he must be running late. After all, he was the captain. A few people milled around and she sat down and waited for him.

After about fifteen minutes she heard someone coming and looked up as he approached her.

"Lieutenant"

"Good evening...Jim. Please call me Nyota."

He sat down beside her. "Nyota...have you eaten?"

"No...I'm not really hungry. Look, we need to talk about something. What am I supposed to say if people ask about us? People are beginning to notice us together even though its not that often, they are putting two and two together. Do you want this to be a secret?"

He took her hand. "I don't care what you tell them. It doesn't have to be a secret. We are two consenting unattached adults. As long as we remain professional on the bridge, no one else has anything to do with how we spend our off duty time."

She did not reply immediately thinking about what she would say.

Kirk took her chin in his hand and turned her face towards him. "Does it bother you what people are saying? Are you embarrassed to be with me since many of them think you are the innocent sheep and I the ravaging wolf?"

She looked at him smiling and knew that he was teasing her. She took his hand and bought it to her lips, brushing them across his knuckles.

"Well you haven't ravaged me yet. No, it doesn't bother me what they say. I just wanted to know how you felt about it if our friends inquired."

Jim was surprised at his response to her light kiss. "Our friends will remain our friends and be happy for us." He pulled her to her feet. " I don't want to talk about that anymore. I am longing to kiss you."

She leaned into him and he captured her lips. A part of her still could not believe that the captain, James T. Kirk was pursuing her. Her heart pounded within her chest. He broke the kiss, looking into her eyes. "I think its going to be a long six months."

"Five months, fifteen days" she replied.

"I see you are counting. I guess there's hope for us after all."

Kirk returned to his quarters thinking about the evening he had spent with Uhura. He was surprised to find Spock and Bones waiting for him.

"Is there something wrong, gentlemen" he asked as he entered his quarters with them following.

"Jim, we need to have a word with you." Bones said sitting down in a nearby chair.

Kirk turned around and looked from him to Spock who was standing with his hands behind his back.

"Spock seems to think that you need me to check you out...that you are still suffering from the ill effects of your treatment on Platonius."

Kirk was immediately irritated.

"And why is that, Mr. Spock?" he asked turning to him.

"Captain, there is no need to be defensive. I have merely pointed out my observations to the doctor. You are acting most irregularly and are exhibiting unusual behavior towards Lieutenant Uhura."

"Define unusual!"

Bones stood up. "Jim, don't get upset. Spock and I are concerned. We just want to help you."

"I don't need any help." Kirk snapped. "Uhura and I are seeing each other, if that's any of your business. We are in a relationship!"

Spock raised an eyebrow. "Captain I feel that this behavior is most unwise."

Bones walked over to the liquor cabinet.

"Jim, what brought this on? You always had a policy of not getting involved with crew members for obvious reasons. Why Uhura? Why now?  
If this doesn't work out, things will become mighty uncomfortable for the both of you!"

"Don't you think I know that!" Kirk said "I have thought of nothing else!  
But whether either of your understand it or not, it's what I want...it's what she wants."

Bones poured himself a drink. "Jim we all know your history...are you sure that this is just not something brought on by what happened and that once you two have...er..done the do so to speak, that your curiosity will be satisfied and she will be left hurt, having to still work with you? Most likely she would then request a transfer and we would lose a damn good communications officer."

Kirk grabbed the liquor bottle out of Bones' hand and poured himself a drink.

"Captain, there are serious repercussions if what the good doctor has said comes to pass. Uhura would be hard to replace." Spock said.

Kirk exhaled trying to keep his rage in check. "You two are supposed to be my closest friends! It's obvious that neither of you have any faith or confidence in me! I of all people know my history. I am serious about a relationship with her, and just her. Why can't you understand that!"

He downed the liquor in his glass in one gulp, then poured another. "I wouldn't even be discussing this much with you if you two weren't my friends, so back off!"

Bones held up both his hands. "OK Jim, we get it. We were just concerned that's all."

"Yeah, I bet." he said sarcastically. You weren't worried about me, you were worried about Uhura and me breaking her 'little heart'. I hate to bring this up fellows, but she's a grown ass woman. She can handle her own business and she doesn't need two boy scouts butting in!"

Spock raised an eyebrow . "We are all aware that Lieutenant Uhura is of legal age, however that is not the point. You gave no indication of a romantic interest in her until after the ordeal on Platonius. Your response to her now may be due merely to a response to stimuli that occurred there and not because of any new feelings you have towards her."

Bones chimed in. "Spock's right. We had to ask you even if you don't like us nosing in your business. Furthermore, I hate to tell you this, captain, there are more than just the two of us 'boy scouts' that care about her. I am sure that you have not heard the last of this one."

Kirk downed the liquor in his glass, giving them both murderous looks.  
As far as I am concerned," he said tensely "This conversation is over."

Bones sat down his glass and nodded towards Spock and they walked out of Kirk's quarters without saying another word.


	3. Chapter 3 Month Two

**Month Two**

Kirk was irritated. Actually that was an understatement. He was more than irritated at the crew. He felt them watching him every time he was in Uhura's vicinity. It was more than mere curiosity. He felt that they really didn't like him seeing her and he knew that he was not just being paranoid. Well he didn't give a damn what they thought!

He knew that his reputation as a ladies man was well known throughout the ship. Some had witnessed his past exploits on different missions and he was sure that he had been the topic of conversation more than once. He had never cared that much in the past and never anticipated that it would come back to haunt him in the future. A lot of grown men his age had past dalliances and affairs with women! That didn't mean that he was a bad person. Oh, they still were still respectful to his face. They had to be. He was the captain after all. However, he could see it in their eyes, in their expressions and their disapproving looks as Uhura appeared by his side in the officers lounge and in the cafeteria and it galled him to no end.

He had no idea until now how many people cared about Uhura. As Bones had pointed out, there were more than just him and Spock being 'boy scouts'. Uhura apparently had a lot of people who loved and respected her. Many of the crew members had established friendly relationships with her. He didn't realize how many until recently. His own yeoman...Rand who had always been pleasant was now somewhat aloof and reserved.

Chekov was especially tense lately. Kirk felt that if he made one wrong move or comment pertaining to Uhura, that the young man would come at him with a solid left hook. He knew that Uhura thought of Chekov as a 'little brother' and he was now playing the role to the hilt. He glared at Kirk every time he saw them together outside of the bridge. On the bridge he was, of course, respectful but the glare was still there

Kirk sat in the captain's chair surveying his surroundings.

"Status, Mr. Checkov"

"Ve are approaching Planet 3 in the Alpha Gamma solar system, sir" he spat.

Kirk paused a moment, noting the emphasis Checkov placed on 'sir'. He decided to ignor it...this time. "ETA?"

"Thirty six minutes." Checkov replied.

"Steady as she goes, Mr. Checkov"

"Aye, aye captain."

Kirk got up and stood beside the navigator. "Is there a problem, Mr. Checkov?"

He looked up. "Problem sir?"

Kirk stood ramrod straight. "You seem tense. If you have something on your mind, I think you should say it." He did not look at him but kept his eyes straight ahead.

Checkov continued working. "Ve are on course and dere is nothing I wish to discuss vith the captain at this time, SIR" He looked up meeting Kirk's gaze and refused to back down.

Kirk looked back as he heard footsteps coming his way. Bones walked over and stood by his chair. He left Checkov and returned to his seat.

"Captain"

"Hello, Bones."

"You don't sound too happy to see me. I came by to check on you. I haven't seen you in a few days."

"Are you sure you didn't come by to make sure I'm not molesting Uhura?" he said the sarcasm obvious in his voice.

"What in the world are you talking about, Jim" Bones asked surprised. "Has someone said something to you?"

"They don't have to. I can see it in their faces and their attitudes." Kirk muttered under his breath, eying Checkov. "If they keep it up, I am going to give all of them a piece of my mind!"

"Come on, let's have some lunch" Bones said grabbing his arm.

Bones found them a table in the officer's cafeteria and sat down. "Look Jim, I will be the first to say that I was surprised when you told me that you were interested in Uhura. But I'll be the first to say that I'm happy for you. She's a great woman and you're not so bad yourself. You're a good guy."

"Well, thank you Bones. I guess that's a compliment of sorts."

Bones sipped his coffee.

"I think that you are being just a little sensitive about this issue because maybe you're a little afraid that you'll do something to mess it up. You are usually so confident with women, but I think you are overcompensating and supersensitive because you know you can't leave this one behind and there are consequences that will affect a lot of people on this ship besides the two of you if it doesn't work out."

Jim stared at his plate and didn't reply. Bones was right. If things didn't work out with Uhura, then he would have a lot of upset crew who would blame him and lose confidence in his leadership abilities. Their respect for him would diminish. There was a lot on the line here.

Bones leaned forward in his seat. "Give yourself a break. Take it easy. Enjoy the moment. I know this much...I can look at her and see she's happy and that she's crazy about you already. The Kirk charm is on full force working its magic. Once they see that you are sincere and she is happy, all will be well, especially if she expresses it to them herself."

Jim leaned back in his seat, feeling some relief. "Oh, really doctor? Has she said anything to you about us?"

"I'm meeting her for her last break before the end of her shift. I can't seem to get a commitment from her for dinner. You have taken up all of her time."

Uhura entered the Sick Bay looking for Dr. McCoy. She found him in a corner with a stack of PADDs on a desk.

Since being on the Enterprise, McCoy had become like a big brother to her. He was gruff and could be short at times, but he always told her the truth and cut to the chase. She liked that about him. He was, however, the captain's best friend and while that had not ever mattered in the past, she felt that now she may not be able to talk to him as freely has she had before.

"Hello, Leonard. Are you planning on sitting behind that desk the rest of the afternoon?"

He smiled at her. She did look happy. Maybe this thing with Jim would work out after all. "Hey Ny, no I was waiting for you. Do you want to go to the cafeteria?"

She pulled up a chair and looked around. The sick bay was empty. "Where's Nurse Chapel?" she asked.

"Oh, you just missed her. Christine is on her lunch break."

"Good I want to talk to you alone...about me and Jim."

McCoy leaned back in the chair "What's there to talk about. I understand from Jim that you two have entered into a relationship. How's that working out?"

"It's working out fine..."

"I hear a 'but' in there somewhere. Out with it!" McCoy said folding his arms across his chest.

"There's no buts, Leonard. It's going really good...almost too good. I guess I'm waiting for the ax to fall or something. I like him a lot. He's charming, hey he's the captain...any woman would want him. I just hope I'm not getting into something I will regret later. I know that he's a man who has been around quite a bit, I need to know Leonard, is he safe? Does he get regular checkups from you after all these affairs?" She grabbed his hands "Please don't say anything to him about our conversation , Leonard. But I need you to put my fears to rest. You're my friend, and I know you're his best friend. Be honest with me. Am I breaking off more than I can chew?"

He shook his head. "Consider this doctor/patient confidentiality. Look what are you worried about? He gets regular check ups from me. He's healthy as a horse. I have talked to Jim, he is serious about you two being together. I've been by his side when a lot of these 'so called' affairs went down, so has Spock. Yes, there have been women. A lot of times he wanted a relationship, but it didn't work out. He's been hurt too. It's not just a simple thing of his going around seducing women."

Bones took her hands in his. "If you want me to check him out again, I will gladly call him in. However, I want you to know that sometimes the reputation is larger than the true facts. I know Jim like I'd know my own kin. He's been looking for love, it's not just sex all the time."

"Did he tell you that we both agreed to not become intimate for six months."

"Six months, you've got to be kidding! Wow, how did you get Jim ever to agree with that!"

"He suggested it. He said that he wants intimacy over sex"

"Well I'll be damned!" McCoy said. He looked at her in disbelief. "You have a problem with that?"

"Not really...but I don't know if I can make it six months with him kissing me every night. It was different when I didn't have anybody."

"Well you two could agree to shorten the time." he said laughing.

"I know...but it's a challenge for the both of us so that when we do finally come together, it will be special."

"Special, huh." McCoy said rolling his eyes. "It'll probably be the quickest climax in history!"

"Leonard!"

He laughed. "You both need to talk about it. Tell him how you feel."

She didn't reply immediately. "Well as of this moment we have four months and ten days to go."

Kirk watched Uhura as she sat on the sofa in her quarters. He stopped by to take her to the cafeteria for dinner. She was looking at him strangely.

"Are you alright, Nyota?" he asked walking over to her.

She stood up. "I was just admiring you in your green wrap around shirt. It's my favorite you know." His hazel eyes seemed to draw her to him.

"I'll be sure to wear it more often" he said giving her a seductive smile.

Nyota smiled and looked away. Damn! He looked delicious. She was horny as hell and he wasn't helping matters any. It was getting to be hard to keep her own libido in check. She hadn't been in a relationship in a while. Now the daily onslaught of his kisses and touches were beginning to get to her. He pulled her into his arms and his lips found her collarbone and began traveling up the side of her neck. She found herself running her hands over his tight backside as he kissed her. She felt him inhale at her touch. Her hands found his chest and she began caressing it. "You are one handsome devil, you know that captain." she said softly.

"I'm glad you approve." he said finding her lips again and then moving to her ear.

The room was getting hotter and hotter and she could feel herself aching for more of him. Her hands traveled over his chest and brushed across his nipples which caused him to intensify his kisses. The ache inside her was driving her crazy. Her hands traveled south running across the obvious bulge in his pants.

A growl escaped his throat and he broke the kiss stepping back from her.  
"I..I think we need to go to dinner." he said breathing hard. She watched the rise and fall of his hard chest and was suddenly embarrassed that he appeared to have much more restraint than she did.

She would not look him in the eye. "Of course, captain".

Jim was confused. What had he done wrong? She seemed upset. He had taken pains to limit himself to kisses only. That was beginning to be hard especially with her hands roaming all over him.

"What's wrong? Are you upset with me?" he asked searching her face.

"No, Jim" she said smiling weakly at him. "I guess I am upset with myself. It looks like you have more restraint and control than I do."

Jim was relieved. He put his arms around her as they walked towards the door. "Don't worry about it. I guess this is one instance where having more experience in certain areas is paying off."

She stopped and turned and looked at him. "I hadn't thought of this before. Perhaps we need to set some parameters...how far can we go."

He studied her a moment. "How far do you want to go?"

"I..I don't trust myself to answer that." she looked away.

"I'll be honest" he said "I'd like to take you to that bed right now, strip you naked and explore every inch of you with my hands...and my mouth, but most likely that would mean I would break our agreement."

She stepped back under the impact of his words. She felt the heat between them and she was only a word away from giving him what they both wanted.

"But" he said interrupting her thoughts "I plan on keeping our promise."

"Well since we are being honest" she said "I'd love you to do just that right now and more. It's getting pretty hard for me to keep my hands off of you which is why I need those parameters."

"I like your hands on me." he said moving closer to her "But that'll have to go both ways. We can limit it to touching...and we will have to agree to stop before things get out of hand...agreed."

"Agreed" she responded.

His lips met hers and he pulled her close. He cupped her buttocks and the ache between her thighs increased. God he felt so good. She ran her hand over his erection and caressed it.

"You're playing with fire, Ms. Uhura" he murmured into her throat. He bought his hand to her breast and squeezed it before moving his hand between her legs. He ran his fingers over the wet barrier of her underwear and then quickly slipped his fingers underneath the material touching her. He heard her inhale as his fingers explored her.

She closed her eyes for a moment as her need for release was trying to overtake her senses. She felt that she was on the verge of losing control totally.

She pulled away not breaking her gaze "I...I think you're right. We should go now."

He did not break her gaze but slowly bought those fingers to his mouth and sucked them. Nyota thought that was the most erotic thing she had ever seen.

"I have a lot to look forward to. I know that this is just a taste of what's to come." he said in a low voice. "Anticipation."

God! How in the world was she going to make it! He was all male and sexy as hell. "Four months and ten days" was all she could say.

Kirk smiled and took her arm walking her out the door. "Four months, nine days. This one is just about over."

Nyota picked at the food that was on her plate. "Jim, I have something I need to say."

He looked at her face which was serious. "Go on"

"I've changed my mind."

Kirk became alarmed. Did she change her mind about giving him a chance? Had their little exchange in her quarters upset her?

"Changed your mind about what?" he inquired warily.

"About the parameters." she said putting down her fork a looking him straight in the eye.

"How long has it been since you have been with a woman?"

Jim was surprised at the question and wondered where she was going with this conversation. "I fail to see what that has to do with anything" he hedged defensively.

She took his hand. "I'm not judging you or anything. You are a handsome, virile man. I didn't expect you to be celibate. I have a reason for asking. Trust me."

Jim let out a deep breath. "It's been about six months." he confessed.

"I see...well it's been about three years for me. You see, I'm out of practice. Now your kisses, your touches are very exciting to me. It is hard for me to control myself. If you truly want me... I need you to let me control the relationship. In other words, I need new parameters.

Kirk wasn't expecting this. He did not know what to say.

"What do you need for me to do?"

"I need you to let me lead. I need you to limit your touches and kisses. I need you to be passive and let me be the leader. No touches, no kisses unless I initiate them and give you permission to touch me."

"That's asking a lot, Nyota. I am used to being the one pursuing."

"Exactly. You are the captain and you are used to being in control and in charge. However until the six month period is up, I need you to hand over those rights to me."

He was quiet for a moment. "Do you really need me to do this?"

"Yes, Jim I do. Do you understand why?"

"Do I have that much affect on you?" he asked smiling.

"It's been a long time for me. I promise you I will be well worth the wait in the end."

Kirk smiled "I'm sure you are."

Nyota cleared her throat, squeezing his hand in hers. "I want us to talk. Tell me what you like in a woman...and in bed. What do you want from me and this relationship? I want to be able to ask you anything and know that you will answer me honestly."

Kirk stared at the hand she was holding appearing to be in deep thought. He made up his mind to be open with her. "I want to be loved...really loved. Who doesn't want that? I want a woman who knows what she wants and is not afraid to express herself...in and out of bed. I need a woman who is not afraid to tell me off when I need it, but wise enough to know when to let something go. I know you have heard some things about me...some are true and some most likely are exaggerated."

Uhura looked at him and he seemed very vunerable. He was rubbing his thumb across her knuckles staring at her hand. "You want honesty from me. Well here it is, I'm tired...I am not a teenager anymore. I need more than just the sex. With sex...there's performance issues and other people's expectations to deal with and live up to. When there is nothing else but the sex, you're not even a person. You are performing and they are performing and you're being rated and you're rating them. It's a feeling for a moment and you don't look at the other person half the time when you are finished, you have nothing to talk to them about and you are ready to just get the hell out of there. It gets old after a while. I need something more."

Understanding came to her as he spoke. He wanted something new, something different. She smiled to herself as she realized that this relationship was not just risky on her part, but his as well. The next four months would be a very eye opening experience indeed.


	4. Chapter 4 Month Three Mudd's Women

Nyota sat in the cafeteria having lunch with Pavel and Janice. It had been weeks since they were able to get together.

"So spill your guts!" Janice said laughing leaning forward. "What's it like to be doing the captain!"

Pavel's face turned red. "Ladies, please. I'm eating!"

Nyota laughed. "You're so nasty, Janice. I'm not doing anything. We are taking it really slow."

"Yeah right!" Janice said "You expect me to believe that James Kirk just wants to be with you for your mind? I have heard about him. He needs a constant supply of booty just to function!"

Pavel snickered and Nyota was beginning to get irritated.

"He's not like that. Really Janice, there's more to the man than an erect penis!"

Pavel started coughing. "Must you talk like dat? My sensitive ears!"

Janice wouldn't let it go. "You mean he knows how to do something else besides run the Enterprise and fuck?"

Pavel cleared his throat. "I think I'd better go...dis is more than I vant to hear! You should listen to Janice, Nyota!"

"No Pavel you stay put!" Nyota said through clenched teeth. "Now listen both of you. You are my friends, so I'll take some of your crap, but let me state this clearly. I will not have you talking about Jim that way. Now I can't speak on how he was in the past, but to me he has been a perfect gentleman. I am proud to be his girlfriend and I expect you as my friends to respect my choice!"

"Ve just vant you to be happy. De captain iz a man who been around. You..."  
he said waving Nyota's way "are sweet and innocent. Ve don't want you to be hurt." Pavel said looking concerned.

Sulu walked over to their table with a tray. "What are you all arguing about? Should I sit here or go somewhere else?"

"Sit down" Nyota snapped "My friends are trying to keep me from being eaten by the big bad wolf!"

Sulu pulled up a chair grinning. "Uh-oh, I've got to hear this first hand!"

"Ve just want her to be careful and not be a fool!" Pavel said to Sulu. "She is like my sister. I don't mind facing the captain if he gets out of line."

"Pavel I am fine. He is fine. Why don't you guys think that he's good enough for me? He is a good man." Nyota said "You ought to give him a chance."

"Look" Janice said munching her salad. "He has a wandering eye. I mean he goes through women like underwear. We are just concerned for you that's all. God, Ny you will have to work with him on the bridge when he gets over you and moves on. Then what? Most likely you will want to transfer. We don't want that to happen!"

"Look, I am a big girl. Why are you ending the relationship before its beginning?" She exhaled trying to be patient. "Can you all do me a favor and just give him a chance...one chance. Maybe, just maybe he wants a monogamous relationship now. People do change, you know."

"You actually believe that the captain is ready to settle down?" Sulu asked giving her a look as if she was a naive child.

Janice rolled her eyes and Sulu and Checkov began to snicker. Nyota gave them her most disapproving stare.

"Look Ny," Janice said "I hope for your sake you are right. I will reserve any future comments and keep them to myself. But we all will be watching and know this: You must be a hell of a woman if you can keep James T. Kirk's undivided attention!

************************************

Kirk was furious with Leo Walsh or Harry Mudd or whatever his name was. The ship had lost three of its precious lithium crystals while saving him and his crew.

He was not prepared for the three women that Mudd had with him. Kirk could immediately tell that the entire male population of the crew were drooling after these women.

While he did find them beautiful, he was more irritated at the predicament that he found himself and the Enterprise in.

He had to bargain with the miners for the crystals and he did not like it. He was going to have to go down to the planet to try to obtain what he needed.

Eve, one of the women had come to his quarters and he knew that he could have her if he wanted her. Thoughts of Nyota bombarded his mind. Eve was very beautiful...but he did not want her. He wanted Nyota. He was not about to travel down that short road of temporary satisfaction again. No,he wanted much more. The miners could have them if they were all agreeable with the arrangement. He felt sorry for Eve, but he wanted and needed those crystals.

He headed to the transporter room to meet Spock and Harry Mudd. He was surprised to find Nyota outside his door as he was exiting.

"You are going down to the planet, captain?" she asked coolly. She was upset and worried that he would go to one of the women. It was not lost on her the effect that those women were having on the crew. She had already heard that one of them had come to his quarters. She would not be made a fool of!

He looked at her. "Yes I am. Do you have a problem with that?" Why wasn't she at her post? Was she on her break? Didn't she realize the seriousness of their situation? The Enterprise was doomed without those crystals!

She didn't answer but turned to walk away obviously upset. It was hard for her to be rational, and she indulged her fears. Why should she have a problem with him ogling other women? Hadn't her friends kept telling her he had a roving eye? Why did she have a problem with him leaving her and going down to the planet to be with them? Better down there than for her to catch him here on the Enterprise!

Kirk was filled with rage. He saw the look in her eyes. She didn't trust him! Hell, she already thought most likely that he had broken his commitment to her. He was disappointed in her attitude, especially now that they were in a crisis and everyone was depending on him. He grabbed her by the arm. "Look, I need those crystals! That's all. I need you of all people to have a little faith in me! I need you to trust me!"

"Do you trust yourself?" she asked her stare unwavering. "I'm not a fool. All the men on this ship are drooling over those women. Are you honestly going to tell me that you don't find them attractive?"

Kirk could not believe that she was acting like this when he had done all he knew how to show her that he wanted her and only her.

"Yes, I know they are attractive. They are very beautiful. However, Lieutenant, as you already know I have made a commitment to someone else and I plan to keep it!"

Damn her! She was no different than the rest of the crew! How long would she despise him for his past? He couldn't change it. What was he supposed to do to make her understand that he wanted her...only her? They were in a crisis. The Enterprise could be doomed. He didn't need her questioning his motives or doubting his fidelity. Totally frustrated, he pulled her into his arms kissing her, cupping and squeezing her buttocks trying to release the fear and desperation that was trying to overtake him.

Nyota was totally unprepared for his onslaught of kisses. She felt that her head was spinning. His lips viciously claimed hers and then traveled down her neck and back to her lips. He seemed desperate and angry and hurt all at once and she was confused not understanding what was going through his mind.

He then stopped kissing her and held her at arms length. His voice was hard and cold. "Every time you don't trust me...every time you question the commitment I have made to you...then I am stepping outside of the parameters you have set up and I will physically show you just how committed I am! I am falling in love with you, Nyota Uhura, can't you see that? You and only you have my heart...and don't you forget it!"

With that he released her and got on the turbolift leaving her standing stunned in the hallway.

Nyota did not see Jim when he returned to the Enterprise. The crisis was over and he had obtained the needed crystals. She waited to hear from him when he returned, but he did not contact her. Perhaps he was still upset with her. She had decided to just give him a little space. However, it was now several weeks after the incident on Rigel XII, and Nyota noticed that Kirk did not ask her to have dinner with him or try to communicate with her in any way outside of her duties on the bridge. He was both formal and polite and appeared to have a wall built up around him. She didn't know what she was going to do about it. He was all business on the bridge and hardly looked her way. She knew that he was upset about her questioning his motives for going to the planet. Hell, she had made a mistake. How long was he going to give her the silent treatment? Well she wasn't going to put up with his little tantrum anymore!

Kirk knew that perhaps he was being too sensitive, but damn it hurt. Nyota had believed that he would dishonor his commitment to her. He had given his word! Didn't that mean anything to her? It was bad enough that he had overhead some of the crew talking about how 'wonderful' she was and what a shame it was that she was 'wasting her time' with him. Oh yes, he heard the whispers. He had even heard it said that he was some sort of sex pervert...that he wasn't good enough for their precious Nyota Uhura! Well if she wanted him, she would have to come to him! He'll be damned if he would grovel and beg for her attention!

He had taken more cold showers lately than he could remember. He was trying to stay within her damn parameters...yet nothing he did was good enough. Nothing could make him worthy of her! He glanced over to her station. He forgot that today was her day off. Damn her! Even when she wasn't there, his mind was on her. He needed a drink...and another shower.

He glanced over at Spock. "Spock, I'm taking a break. You have the con."

He walked off the bridge in a huff. He knew that he was being irrational and that Spock was wondering what was up with him. Well, to hell with them all! He stabbed the button on the turbolift. This day just had to get better somehow.

***********************

Nyota stood outside the quarters of James T. Kirk. She hesitated because of what she was about to do. She knew that she could get into trouble, but she didn't care. She knew he should be on the bridge. This was breaking and entering. She had memorized his code to his quarters after watching him enter it on several occasions and she was going there to wait for him. She had used her entire day off to mull over their current situation.

She quickly entered the code and walked in and was shocked when she saw him standing shirtless obviously having recently showered with a towel around his neck. He turned around and faced her, looking her up and down. "Can I help you, Uhura?" he asked. 

Damn, she wanted to wipe that smirk off of his face! She knew that he realized that she wasn't expecting him to be there. "I haven't heard from you in several weeks...I haven't seen you outside of the bridge." she said trying to regain her composure.

He walked over to her while rubbing himself with the towel. "I recall that you wished to be the leader in this relationship. Why didn't you contact me?"

He was standing too close to her. Her heart was beating rapidly and she could smell the soap on his damp body. He was watching her closely. His hazel eyes bore into her. She looked away.

"If you want me to say I'm sorry Jim... ok, I'm sorry" she whispered.

"What are you sorry for, Nyota? Are you sorry for getting involved with a depraved sex fiend like me? You want to go and find some nice, straight laced never-been-laid before man with no history? Is that what you want?"

She was shocked at the pain in his voice. His eyes roamed hungrily over her, his lust and need apparent. She looked at him standing there, his chest rising up and down, his hair still damp. The pants he wore fitted him snugly..too snugly as she could see his obvious erection. He was watching her looking at him and he seemed slightly amused and deliberately shifted himself in his pants.

He moved closer still to her, but still did not touch her. She felt the sweat run down between her breasts from the heat. She could feel his breath on her face...he was just that close, but still he did not touch her. His hazel eyes were locked to hers and she felt like she was melting. He had not even done anything yet, but the electricity between them was overpowering her. Her body was aching, calling out to his even though he had not touched her. If he did touch her, she felt like she would explode. He leaned in even closer, his face almost touching hers.

"What are you sorry about? Sorry that I don't meet up to your expectations? Sorry that I am less than what you expected in a man?" he asked angrily.

His face was so close to hers that she could feel the light sprinkle of his saliva on her face as he spoke. It should have been offensive to her, but she longed to taste it, to taste him. She felt like she was losing her mind.

"You asked me what I wanted in a woman, and I tried to be honest and tell you. Now it's your turn, Ms. Perfect. Tell the pervert captain what you want in a man...Could it be that you want someone to fuck you with the lights out... who fucks you nice and slow and easy...someone always on top...so prim and proper!"

Why was he talking to her like this? Is that what he believed? Did he feel that she thought she was perfect, while he was some sort of pervert?  
"I don't think you're depraved." she said barely above a whisper. "And I'm not prim and proper...my thoughts about what I want from you are not that nice...or proper!"

Jim was desperate to take her in his arms, but he willed himself not to. He wanted her to want him as much as he wanted her. He wanted her to say something to take away the sting of humiliation he felt when he heard what the crew thought about them being together. He wanted her to feel the burn he was feeling...the pain of the unquenched lust and desire that was trying to consume him.

"What do you want right now, Ms. Prim and Proper." he said licking his lips. "Tell the pervert captain what you want."

Nyota's throat was dry. She felt like she was drowning in his eyes. Why was he calling himself names? What had she done to make him feel this way? His eyes were undressing her, searching. He was careful not to touch her, but that didn't make any difference. She was burning up. "I want...

"Yes?" he said "I'm waiting."

"I want your forgiveness..." she reached out and pulled his head towards her kissing him. He did not kiss her back, nor did he put his arms around her. He needed more from her. He needed her to say it, to tell him that he was what she needed and wanted.

"Do you want me to beg?" she whispered. "Alright then, I'll beg. Please forgive me for doubting you. I need you Jim. I ache for you. I was jealous. You could have any woman you want, and sometimes I don't understand why you want me. Please..."

Something in her snapped as she began kissing his chest, running her tongue across his nipples. She felt that she couldn't control the feelings that were overtaking her and she didn't want to try. She felt him inhale and she knew that he was close to breaking, that his resolve was crumbling.

"Beg some more. Tell me that my needs matter...and that you're willing to please me just like I'm willing to please you. Tell me that you will trust me to give myself only to you." His voice cracked under the stress of trying to maintain control and she could hear the depth of emotion in it. His fists were clenched to his sides as he willed them not to touch her before he got what he wanted from her. He was breathing hard and shaking slightly, almost hyperventilating.

"Tell me that you want me...that I'm worthy of you. Tell me that you want me and only me." His voice sounded both angry and pleading.

Nyota realized then that he was not just saying things being mean. He needed reassurance from her that she wanted him and that she trusted him. Somehow he thought that whatever he needed from her for his own sexual satisfaction she would find offensive. They had never discussed that and she was puzzled, wondering why he felt her to be such a prude. She remembered that he had told her that he was falling in love with her before he beamed down to retrieve the crystals. She wanted him to know that her feelings matched his.

"I'm falling in love with you too, Jim. I've missed you. I missed you so much these last few weeks. We still have three months and one week to go and I don't think I'm going to make it! You're no pervert and you're not depraved. Whatever we do as consenting adults is our business. Nothing you ask of me will be judged. I want to please you. You're my man and now I need you." She kissed him again exploring him with her hands. Her mouth trailed kisses down his chest. She reached his stomach and fell to her knees. She nipped at him through the cloth of his pants.

He pulled her to her feet. "No, let's wait...I can wait."

She was desperate. He might be able to wait, but she was on fire. If she didn't get some release, she felt like she would go crazy.

She took his hand and guided it between her thighs. "I'm dying here. I'm no prim and proper lady. I am so hot for you right now. I need you to touch me...give me something... I'm not strong like you. I need you...please Jim."

Jim was surprised at her boldness and pulled her into his arms. "Is this what you want?" He slipped his hand easily in her underwear finding her very wet. He slipped his fingers inside her kissing her as she let out a gasp. He pushed her against the wall and she arched her back towards him giving him better access. She was about to get a small taste of just what he liked and then he would know if she agreed with the crew. He could feel her heat which seemed to be building, her hips moved to meet the thrust of his fingers. She seemed almost wild. "You like it?" he said licking her ear. "Tell me you like it." She was moaning which was driving him crazy and her eyes were closed. He flattened his tongue, licking her ear as his fingers worked.

He could feel her need and wanted to give her more than the fingers he was sliding in and out of her. "You like this finger fucking, Nyota?" he whispered in her ear between licks. "Tell me you like it!"

"Yes, oh yes Jim I like it." she whispered back. He then ran his thumb over her clit and he felt her explode on his hand. Her body stiffened under the intensity of her orgasm and he pulled her closer with his other arm as he felt her spasms on his fingers. His hand felt saturated. He removed his hand slowly trying to capture as much of her wetness on his fingers without rubbing it off against her underwear.

Her body relaxed and he raised his hand and held it up in front of her. He licked his fingers catching the wetness with his tongue as it ran down his hand. He then quickly kissed her, his mouth and face still slick from her wetness and he rubbed his face against hers. He waited for her to protest, but she did not. He sucked his fingers staring into her eyes. He removed the fingers from his mouth and kissed her hard. She in turn licked his face when he broke the kiss.

"Oh, you're a bit of a freak. I like that. You surprise me, Lieutenant." he said licking her face again.

"I can assure you, captain," she said doing the same to him, "I am full of surprises."


	5. Chapter 5 Month Four Jealous Jim

**Jealous Jim**

Nyota Uhura realized that James T. Kirk was a complex man. On the bridge he was the captain, in charge and in control. He was in his element. He could get them out of most any jam they found themselves in.

He was strong and arrogant and demanded respect. However, he was never bossy or mean. He didn't think himself above correction, but you had better have your facts straight when you did it, buster! He didn't mind admitting that he didn't know everything.

He could not stand bigotry of any kind. He didn't like assumptions or presumptions. He set impossible standards for himself and while he held high standards up for others to emulate, he did not belittle them if they were not able to achieve them. He just encouraged them to try harder.

After her visit to his quarters they had grown even closer, not because of his ability to please her with his fingers, but what came after...much after, when they had talked and talked and he had shared so much with her.

Running from woman to woman had left him with a few insecurities. Quick sex, he admitted to her had been somewhat exciting but never fulfilling. He longed for intimacy he told her, and knew this desire was what fueled his resolve to wait for her. He told her that she was like a Christmas package that he did not want to open until the holiday. He was content to wait. He just needed her trust and love to spur him on. She didn't think he was aware of the total animal magnetism he possessed, that a mere look and sly smile made her want to shed her clothes and have her way with him.

His sexual taste, she felt, wasn't much different from any other mans. They all had their freaky side that they wanted their women to open their minds to without fear of condemnation. She encouraged him to talk and share those with her and she smiled when she saw the relief on his face. Nothing he mentioned was that shocking to her and she laughed at his shyness in his reluctance of expressing his fantasies and desires to her.

When she had demanded her right to reciprocate after his fingers worked their magic on her, he had resisted stating that he wanted to wait. She had promptly ignored his feeble protests and yanked his pants down and possessed him with her mouth.

He could hardly protest once she had him where she wanted him. It was over too soon and she thought of what Dr. McCoy had said to her about the quickest orgasm in history. She then kissed him, sharing the contents of her mouth with him taking him totally by surprise. He later told her that she was more woman than he had ever hoped for and that she could rejoice in the fact that she had him totally whipped.

They hadn't totally broken their promise of 'no sex' but they had put a big crack in it that night in his quarters. She then quickly changed the rules from 'no sex' to 'no intercourse'. However, she felt that their little indiscretion was well worth it for what she felt like they had gained and then vowed that she would stay well within the parameters until the end of the six month period. She tested the boundaries of their agreement even more by telling him that she would spend the night with him that night, however, they would only sleep together and there would be no sexual contact of any kind. It was another experiment in intimacy. He had agreed and had joked that he doubted if he would get much sleep lying next to her.

Nyota now smiled to herself as she eagerly anticipated their night together. She quickly finished dressing and headed for the bridge to begin her shift.

Kirk walked on the bridge feeling better than he had in a long time. He was in a great mood and nothing was going to dampen his spirit! He looked at Spock who was at his station and headed to the captain's chair.

"Captain, ve are approaching Space Station K7" Checkov said as he sat down.

"Good." Kirk said and turning to Uhura. "Lieutenant, open hailing frequencies. Contact Space Station K7 and let them know that we have arrived with the requested medical supplies. Have Dr. McCoy report to the transporter room."

"Aye, aye Captain"

Kirk tried not to let his gaze linger on Nyota too long. He eagerly anticipated their evening together later on.

He had never met a woman quite like her.

"Captain" Uhura said breaking his train of thought.

"Yes Lieutenant"

"I am receiving a transmission from Mr. Lurry from Space Station K7."

"Alright, put it on video." Kirk said

"Kirk" Lurry said as the transmission came through. "We appreciate you being so prompt in getting us those medical supplies. They were much needed after we experienced that ruckus broke out here last month."

"No problem." Kirk said "I trust that you survived those Armenians who do so like to have a good time."

"A good time? They almost wrecked things here totally with their wild antics. Starfleet assured us that nothing like that would happen again."

Kirk laughed and looked over at Spock who raised an eyebrow. Even though the Armenians were highly intelligent beings, they didn't act like that when they got a hold of romulan ale. Spock found them 'most illogical.'

"Their wild fights nearly wiped out the Space Station and we used up most of our supplies patching them up!"

"I trust things are calmer there now." Kirk said still laughing.

"Yes they are. Look Kirk, I am really calling you because Admiral Kelly is expected here this evening and he requested your presence at dinner tonight."

Damn! He didn't want to go to some stuffy dinner! "Uh, Mr. Lurry we had planned on pulling out as soon as we drop off your supplies."

Lurry let out a long breath. "I'm sorry, captain. He didn't present it to me as a request, more of an order."

"I see. What time is this dinner?"

"1900 hours" Lurry said. "You can bring your officers if that is any consolation."

"Fine. I will let you know how many. Kirk out."

Damn! Well at least he could take Nyota. He turned around and faced her.

"Lieutenant, Mr. Spock I expect you two to suffer with me. Notify Dr. McCoy and Mr. Scott also." he said leaving the chair and walking over to her.

He leaned over her station. "Don't think you're getting out of our little meeting tonight." he whispered.

"I wouldn't dream of it captain." she said smiling.

He looked up and saw Spock watching them. He smiled and returned to his seat.

Kirk left the bridge at 1700 hours. He knew that Nyota was behind him. He got on the turbolift with her following.

"Are you following me, Lieutenant?" he asked smiling.

"My shift has also ended, Captain." she replied. She walked over and kissed him when the door closed.

"This kiss is no where near as exciting as the one you gave me the other night." he whispered in her ear.

"Oh really. Unfortunately you will have to wait two months and three days to receive that type of kiss again." she said.

The turbolift stopped and she got off. "See you shortly."

Kirk leaned back against the wall as the turbolift continued to his deck.  
He hoped that the dinner would pass quickly.

Nyota walked into the transporter room and found everyone there accept Jim.

Spock and McCoy were dressed in their Starfleet dress uniform. Scotty was dressed handsomely in his kilt. She walked over to him.

"You look mighty handsome there Mr. Scott." she said smiling. "Hoping to turn a few ladies heads tonight."

Scotty smiled "Aye, lass. But I doubt if any are there besides you. I will have to be content to look upon the captain's good fortune and then satisfy myself with some scotch when I return."

McCoy came over and took her hand and kissed it. "You look absolutely beautiful tonight, Ny." he said looking over the white dress she was wearing.

"Thank you Leonard."

The doors made their familiar 'swoosh' sound and Kirk entered the room dressed in his Starfleet dress uniform. Nyota thought that he was too handsome for his own good.

"OK people. Let's go." he said walking to the pad. Everyone followed and he nodded. "Energize."

The dinner was boring just as Jim expected. Admiral Kelly sat there telling war stories and Jim acted like he was interested when his mind was really on Nyota. The Admiral had bought several of his staff with him who seemed to fawn over every word he said.

However, what irked Jim the most was what he felt was the Admirals attention to Uhura. Admiral Kelly was sitting by her whereas he was sitting across from her. That didn't bother him until the Admiral put his arm around her chair and leaned in continually to make comments to her. He felt a nerve tick in his jaw, but said nothing, choosing instead to watch them closely and sip his water.

"Kirk, I must say that having you and your officers for dinner is the perfect end to my otherwise dreary day. He looked at Uhura his eyes traveling over her as much as he could see with her sitting beside him.  
"You," he said smiling at Uhura "Are quite a beauty. Surely you aren't married?"

"No..." Nyota said "But I have someone."

"Well until the knot is tied, I'd say you were fair game." he said leaning in even closer.

Kirk tried to keep his voice even "I would appreciate it Admiral, if you would keep your distance from her. She has clearly stated that she is not interested in you and that she already has somebody."

The Admiral laughed. "Oh come on Kirk! I don't bite and she's a big girl." He let his finger run up and down her arm as it was draped across the back of her chair.

Nyota looked at Jim. "I'm fine captain."

"See, " the Admiral said "She's fine."

Scotty put his hand on his arm and Kirk exhaled. "Of course." he said.

The Admiral turned back to Uhura. "So do I know this lucky fellow? That way I can size up my competition."

Nyota didn't reply immediately but looked at Jim.

The Admiral followed her gaze and started laughing. "Surely not you, Kirk. Then I am in luck. All I have to do is wait my turn."

Kirk jumped up from his seat itching to hit the Admiral, but thought better of it.

"Admiral it's been a long evening. I appreciate the dinner, however, we must now take our leave of you."

"Don't be so touchy, Kirk. I was only joking. Everyone knows your reputation. I am just trying to protect the poor girl's feelings."

"I appreciate your concern, sir" Nyota said "However, it is unfounded. The captain is a very loyal and attentive man."

The admiral took a sip of his drink. "A leopard can't change its spots, eh Kirk?" he said smiling. "I think you have the poor girl snowed."

Kirk wanted to smack the stupid grin off of his face. "As I said, we thank you for your hospitality, but we must take our leave."

He walked around the table and pulled out Nyota's chair. "Lieutenant, let's go."

"Good evening, Admiral" he said walking off and not looking back.

He heard the Admiral's laughter as he pulled out his communicator to summon the Enterprise.

Nyota watched Kirk's jerky movements as he undressed for bed. She was beginning to learn his moods by his movements.

"Who the hell does he think he is?" he said sitting on the side of the bed.

"Why are you letting him get to you?" Nyota said. "Let it go. No one can make you feel inferior without your permission."

He looked at her for a moment and smiled. "So is this one of your grandmother's wise old sayings?"

"Actually" she said kissing him. "It's from First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt."

Kirk stripped down to his underwear and climbed into bed. "I think I like her style."

"Now what do we do, Ms. Uhura?" he asked smiling at her.

"We talk, and we go to sleep. That's all."

"To be honest, I'm too tired to talk. This whole day has drained me and I have an early day on tomorrow." he said rubbing his eyes.

She turned her back to him and he pulled her close.

"I could get used to this you know." he said putting his chin on her shoulder.

"That's the whole point."

"Would you be upset with me if something's poking you in the back in the morning?" he whispered.

"I'd be upset if something wasn't." she said laughing "I'd begin to wonder what your problem was. However, I can't help you with it, you'll have to resort to using the shower for relief."

"Ah, you are a heartless woman Nyota Uhura, sleeping so close to me and enticing me like you do."

She snuggled even closer to him. "And you don't think you have the same affect on me? Mines just not as obvious."

"Really? Shall we ask Mr. Finger?"

She giggled "Goodnight, Jim"

He kissed her neck "Goodnight...only two months and a few days to go."


	6. Chapter 6 Month Five Elaan's Seduction

**Elaan's Seduction**

Kirk stared at the blank screen after the transmission had ended. He did not know what he was going to do.

He had received his orders to complete a mission to the planet Troyius where he was to pick up Petri the Troyian Ambassador to help with a peacekeeping mission on planet Aerion II.

Perhaps he could pick up Petri and not see her...Elaan. It had been a year since he had dropped her off to be married. Was he still under the hypnotic effect of her tears? There was no cure so more than likely when he would come into her presence; all of his feelings for her would come flooding back. What would he tell Nyota?

They were six weeks away from total consummation of their relationship. He did not want anything to interfere with that. However, he had his duty to perform. He had no choice but to try to talk to her.

Kirk returned to the bridge and walked over to Uhura's station.

"I need to see you in the conference room, Lieutenant." he said and walked off the bridge knowing that she would follow.

He heard her behind him as he walked into the turbolift.

"Is everything alright?"

"No."

Nyota looked at him and could tell that he was worried. She wondered what the problem was and why he only wanted to see her. He ushered her into the conference room.

"Look. You know I received a transmission from Starfleet."

"Yes, top priority. Everyone is wondering what it was all about. They expect you to brief them on it."

"I will, but I need to discuss it with you first." Jim said.

Nyota wondered what was going on. He was watching her as if he was unsure what to say.

He took her hand. "You know I love you, Nyota. You are the woman for me."

She looked at him feeling anxious. "There's a 'but' in there somewhere Jim, so out with it."

"No buts...not about me loving you anyway." he exhaled. He would just have to come out with it.

"Our assignment is to pick up Ambassador Petri from the planet Troyius. Starfleet has a diplomatic mission they are sending him on. I am to meet the leaders and attend a dinner to discuss our plans to keep Petri secure."

"So what's the problem?"

"The problem, Nyota is Troyius. Don't you remember Elaan, the 'Dohlman'? She was the leader of Elas who married the leader of Troyius. You allowed her to stay in your quarters."

"Oh yes, now I remember." Nyota said thinking. "She was the rude, ill-mannered, ill-tempered woman who broke up some of my things. Yes I remember her very well! What about her?"

"Did you know that the women of Elas can drive men wild with their tears? If their tears touch a man, he will forever be hopelessly in love with her. I..I touched her tears, Nyota."

She stared at him a moment taking it all in. "Are you saying you are still in love with her?" Nyota said her voice rising.

"Nyota, it's not like that! I love you! It's just that...I don't know. I don't feel that I love her, but I'm not in her presence. I don't know what will happen once I get there. She's married anyway. I don't want to even go down to the planet, but I have my orders."

"What do you want from me, Jim" she said. She was confused.

"I..I don't know. I guess I just need your support and understanding."

"Understanding?" Nyota said shocked "Understanding for what? Do you want a license from me to sleep with _her?_"

"I don't want to sleep with her!" he said irritated. "I just need you to understand that I will be struggling and why, that's all"

"Did you sleep with her before?"

"Yes."

Nyota looked away. Feelings of jealousy and insecurity came over her. What did he want from her? How could she compete with a woman who had already taken his heart as well as his body?

"I don't know what to say, Jim. This is a little overwhelming."

"I understand. I just felt that I should tell you about it first. I mean, I am going to ask Bones to go back and research the cure for the tears. He started on it and came close to a solution, but then she was gone and I didn't really need an antidote."

He sat there staring at the table and Nyota stood up. She needed time to think. He grabbed her hand, looking up at her. His eyes bore into her and they possessed a desperation she had never seen before.

"Don't leave me."

She stared at this man she had come to love. She did not want to share him. She did not want to think about another woman enjoying what she had yet to experience. He seemed unsure of himself, therefore he was unsure of her. "Where shall I go, Jim?"

She leaned down and kissed him.

"I'd better get back" she said

"I know."

Kirk sat with Bones and Spock in the Officer's lounge.

"We will be arriving at Troyius with forty eight hours." he said. "Bones, can you continue the work you did last year on finding an antidote?"

"I came close, Jim. However I doubt if I will have answer for you within forty eight hours."

"Captain," Spock said "Now that the Dohlman is married, you may not be in direct contact with her outside of a public setting. You hopefully will not find yourself in an uncomfortable situation where your desire for her may be unchecked. Most likely her husband has also been affected and will not allow her out of his sight."

"I don't plan to be in any situation where the two of us will be alone, Mr. Spock." Kirk said "I love Nyota. I do not wish to do anything to jepardize that."

"Jim, I know you feel that way now. Do you think that your love for Ny will be enough to resist her?" Bones asked looking at him. "We've got to be realistic. I suggest that one of us, and I mean Spock and I, be with you at all times until we return to the Enterprise with the Ambassador. We can't take any chances. You may not be able to help yourself."

Kirk sighed. "You may be right, Bones. Any help that I can get from the both of you will be greatly appreciated."

Nyota stared at the ceiling from her bed. She was glad that today was her day off and that she did not have to go to the bridge.

She did not know what she should do. She wanted to trust Jim. She really did, but she did not know what she would do if he ended up cheating on her.

She had gathered all the information she could on the women of Elan. Even though Dr. McCoy stated that he had come close, no one had found a reliable cure for the tears. It appears that the men were forever enslaved to these women once they had been exposed.

However, she told herself that if Jim had escaped her once, he could do it again. What if she wanted him? He would not be able to resist her. Would she then not take him back because he did what he could not help doing?

The buzzer to her door interrupted her thoughts. "Come"

She got up off of the bed and walked to the door and Jim came into her room.  
She stood there a moment watching him.

"Are you ok?" he asked.

Nyota sat back on the bed. "I guess so. I was just thinking."

"About what?" He walked over and stood in front of her.

She looked up at him and smiled. "Just how much I love you."

He bent down and kissed her. "I love you too. I want you to know that I don't want her. I want you." He touched the lips he had just kissed affectionately.

She sighed. "Yes, but you may not be able to help yourself."

"Spock and Bones have vowed to stay by my side the entire time I'm there." he said studying her. "I think I will be fine."

"I hope so." she said letting her fingers dancing across the front of his pants. His response was immediate. "I want you to remember that this is mine." she said fingering the bulge there. "I'm getting more anxious for it each day."

Jim laughed. "I'm anxious to give it to you."

Her hands ran over him possessively. She stood and started at his head, running her fingers through his hair. She backed him up against her bed and pushed him down. She then lay on top of him kissing his forehead. She lightly touched his ears, then his nose and then his lips. "You're so damn gorgeous." she remarked her hands now on his chest. "No wonder other women want you. That's one reason why I was so hesitant in getting involved with you in the first place."

He grabbed and kissed her hand. "But I only want you." he said simply. "You can believe that." He never broke his gaze from hers, his hazel eyes dancing.

She smiled because she did believe him. Whatever happened, she knew in her heart that she was the one he wanted. She hoped that McCoy and Spock would be able to help him keep his distance from the Dohlman.

Kirk beamed down to Troyius with Spock and McCoy. He did not know what to expect.

He was somewhat relieved when Ambassador Petri met them. "Greetings, Kirk" he said walking up to them. He looked at Spock and Bones. "Dr, Mr. Spock" I am glad you are here. Hopefully you had a pleasant trip."

He led them from the Troyius Convention Station where they had arrived at to the short distance into the royal palace.

"Our leader, His Excellency is away on business, however, Your Grace, Mistress Elaan is anxious to see all of you." He looked at Kirk smiling slyly. "Especially you, captain."

"I will see her as long as Mr. Spock and Dr. McCoy is present, Petri" he said, his tone serious.

Petri paused looking at him. "I see. Are you afraid to be alone with her captain? I can assure you that His Royal Highness our leader here is aware of...and has no problem with your prior relationship with Elaan."

"I have a problem with it, Petri. I am here to complete my mission. That is all." Kirk said

"Hello Captain."

Kirk turned around quickly as did Spock and Bones. Elaan was standing to their right at the end of the hall. Ambassador Petri paused and then turned leading them towards her. As they drew closer, Kirk felt his heart rate accelerate and he began to get warm. He gave Spock and Bones a nervous glance. They met his gaze and nodded.

"Hello Elaan." he said when he reached her. She smiled and reached out and touched his hand. Her touch was hot and he was suddenly overcome with desire.

"I will have someone show you to your rooms. Captain, I would love to have some time so that we can...talk. It has been a while. I have been looking forward to this day." Her intentions were clear and Kirk tried not to panic.

"Elaan.." Kirk was having a hard time concentrating. His eyes bore into her and she wet her lips in anticipation. He tore his eyes away and look pleadingly at Spock and Bones.

We have our instructions" Spock said. "The captain does not have a lot of time for socializing. We will be leaving within twenty four hours."

Bones chimed in. "Your Grace, we are here by the instructions of the Federation to discuss with you security for Ambassador Petri and his mission of peace on Aerion II. I am sure that you can understand that the captain does not wish to be distracted from this mission."

"I see" she said looking at Kirk "You have no desire...to see me?"

"I...I think it best if I do not" Kirk said looking away.

She paused. "Very well then, captain" She then turned and walked away.

Two royal guards came and let them to their rooms.

"You have approximately an hour before dinner." Petri said. "I will have someone come back at that time."

"Thank you." Kirk said feeling relieved.

Kirk waited until the guards had left and then came out of his room and knocked on Spock's door.

"Spock." Kirk said "I want to exchange rooms with you. I don't trust her."

"Indeed." Spock said "I think that is a wise move."

The dinner was formal but brief. It included the Troyian Security Council. Kirk wished that he could have brought Nyota with him. He felt that if he kept his distance from Elaan, then all would go well.

She was at the dinner and was watching him. She talked with Bones and Spock, but her eyes were always watching him. Seeing her made him hot as if he had a fever. It was not like the feelings he had for Nyota. It was more of an uncontrollable obsession. It was like a force that was out of his control. It made him feel weak and drugged. He did not like it.

He was glad when the dinner was over and returned to his room. He would be glad when morning would come and he would be able to return to the Enterprise. He didn't know why he couldn't just leave after the dinner, but he had his orders.

He climbed into the bed feeling tired. The effect of the tears was wearing on him when he was in her presence. He felt that there was a battle raging between his mind and body.

Kirk was a light sleeper when he was in unfamiliar surroundings and he heard the sound of the door opening. He opened his eyes trying to adjust to the semi darkness of the room. He quickly sat up in the bed and turned on the lights.

Elaan was standing there. "You knew I would come." she said.

How did she know that Spock had traded rooms with him? He tried not to panic.

"Why are you here, Elaan. I do not want you here."

"You want me, Captain. I have waited a whole year for this. Your little ploy of changing rooms did not work. I have eyes and ears everywhere. It took a lot of maneuvering with my contacts in the Federation to request your ship specifically to come here, and to get an order for you to have to stay here overnight. Now I am here to claim my reward for all my hard work!"

"You have a husband." Kirk said stalling."Your efforts should be put in making your marriage work, not in getting me for one night."

"He is a green pig. I long for you. It is a marriage of convenience. You know this." Her eyes roamed hungrily over him.

Kirk got off the bed "Yes, I know this, Elaan, however, I am in love with someone else. I am not the same man you had on the Enterprise. I don't want to lose her."

"She does not have to know." she said smiling slyly.

"Women always know. You know that" Kirk said looking away.

She didn't answer but walked over to him. He was frozen in that spot, unable to move. She ran her hands down his bare chest. He grew hot under her touch. His mind was screaming, but his body had no conscience. He was instantly hard which was obvious to her. She came into his space, her faces inches from his. He could smell her scent. She smelled sexual, and he knew she was already aroused. He felt trapped and he began to sweat. He closed his eyes feeling helpless.

"See, you want me." she said satisfied with the effect she was having on him.

"My body may want you Elaan, but my mind wants Nyota. Even if you succeed, I may be making love to you, but I will be thinking of her. I love her."

She stared at him for a moment. She then ran her hands across his chest pinching the nipples. He groaned. She laughed at his response, touching his erection. Her hands felt hot and he was on fire, his desire for release mounting. He grabbed her wrist as her hands fumbled with the drawstring of his black federation lounging pants.

"I only want Nyota." he whispered trying to maintain control. "It is her that I burn for, not you! She has captured my mind and heart. You may have me physically, but Nyota has me mentally even right now as you touch me. If you press this issue, it will be her name I call out in lovemaking and not yours."

"Very well!" she spat. "Return to your precious Nyota!" She then turned and stomped out of the room.

Kirk was thankful when they beamed back to the Enterprise the next day.  
He tried not to look as if he was in a rush, but hurried to the bridge.

Nyota was at her console and looked up at him, the obvious question in her eyes. He smiled at her and she smiled back, relieved.

Kirk walked directly to the captain's chair and sat down. He could feel her eyes on him. He quickly checked their position.

"Prepare to leave orbit, Mr. Sulu."

He then stood up and walked over to her.

Mr. Spock was watching him. "Captain."

Both he and Nyota looked at Spock. "I believe it is time for that meeting you spoke of with Lieutenant Uhura earlier. It required your immediate attention and I know you do not wish to be late."

It took a moment or both of them to catch on. Spock was silent and raised an eyebrow.

"Thank you for reminding me, Mr. Spock." he said smiling at her.

"Lieutenant, would you please follow me."

"Of course, captain" she said. "Give me a moment to have my relief replace me."

"My quarters." he whispered. He then turned and left the bridge.

Nyota walked into his quarters and found him waiting for her. He quickly pulled her in his arms kissing her.

"I gather that you were able to resist the Dohlman." she said. "Was it difficult?"

"Yes and no" he said smiling. "I don't want to talk about that. I am just glad it's over."

"I can't help but ask how you did it." she said

He smiled at her. "I appealed to her ego and pride, which I remember are quite enormous. I told her that if I made love to her, that I would be thinking only of you because I was in love with you."

"And that worked?" she asked surprised.

"Would you want me making love to you, thinking about another woman?"

"I guess not."

"I guess we'd better return. I appreciate this little opportunity Mr. Spock presented." he said.

"Not yet, captain." she pushed him back on the bed and he looked at her surprised.

He quickly recovered looking at her slyly with the look that always made her hot. "What do you have in mind?"

"I have a little reward for you for your...perseverance in a difficult situation." Her eyes roamed over him. "I see you have on my favorite shirt. You must pay for that. You are making me compromise our agreement."

She grabbed his crotch squeezing his already erect member.

"I am ready for my punishment." he said "What is it?"

She smiled. "A kiss. The kind you like so very much."

Kirk looked at her as she quickly undid his pants. His eyes closed as she claimed him. God, he loved this woman. He knew that. It wasn't just the sex, it was everything about her, and it was a feeling of such immense proportions. This was what had been missing in his life, the freedom to love so openly and unconditionally, and to receive it in return. Everything about her made him feel alive in a way that he had never felt before.

For once in his life he could come to a woman and not have to deal with putting up a front, trying to put on a performance and then wondering if he could measure up to her expectations. He didn't have to worry about if he was big enough, could last long enough or worry and wonder about what she wanted from him. He could relax and just be himself. They were almost there. Six weeks...six weeks until he could possess her totally. He knew that she had done to him what no woman had ever been able to accomplish.

Uhura Nyota, he realized, had gained possession of more than just his body, and oh god was she ever possessing his body right now. It was taking all of his will to hold back his release, for he wanted to enjoy this a little longer. The first time she did this he had a difficult time lasting under the teasing of her talented tongue; and at first the quickness of his climax embarrassed him. She had quickly kissed his humiliation away, telling him that it really didn't matter to her. She told him that she did it to please him and that she was satisfied that she had achieved her goal. After all,she said, they had all the time in the world to practice for improvement. She had then continued down the road to capturing his mind and heart totally. No woman had ever made him feel loved like she did.

No woman had ever totally captivated his thoughts, his mind, his heart. Now he now gladly turned over the reigns of all he was to her to love and possess for a lifetime.


	7. Chapter 7 Month Six Double Duty

James Tiberius Kirk was a happy man. He could see the finish line. Two weeks! Two weeks until she would be totally his. He grinned to himself. He had flowers. He had candles. He had liquor and chocolate that he planned to melt. He had silk sheets. He had everything he could think of to please her.

He also had his secret stash, handcuffs and a few other items. He grinned in anticipation. He hoped that she would ask him for them. He wanted her to use them on him. He would then reveal the rest of his kinky fetishes to her and he guessed that she had a few of her own to bare.

He glanced over at her station from the Captain's chair. She had her back to him. He suppressed a grin. He had made it this far, so now all he had to do was cruise on home.

He had to get his mind back on his duty at hand. He prepared to beam down with a geological party to the surface of Alfa 177. It should be a totally uneventful day.

Nyota relaxed in her quarters wondering what was going on. Something wasn't right. Jim had been acting quite strange since he had returned back from Alfa 177.

He had spoken to her before he beamed down telling her that he would come to her when he returned. She knew he was back, but she had not heard from him and wondered if everything was alright. At first she decided to just leave well enough alone, but now decided that she would go by his quarters before he returned to the bridge in hopes to get some answers.

The door of her quarters opened and she was surprised to see Jim. Good! Now she wouldn't have to go looking for him. She was surprised at his demeanor. He looked upset and had scratches on his face. He turned to her with a wild look in his eyes.

"What in the world happened to you?" she asked. "Did everything go well down on the planet."

He stared at her a moment and then gave her a lewd grin. "Nyota, how nice of you to be so concerned." He watched her licking his lips, his hand holding an obvious erection. He then grabbed her, pulling her into his arms. Nyota thought he looked rather wild. She wondered what had gotten into him.

"I've missed you." He kissed her hard. "Two weeks is too long to wait. I want you now! Get undressed, that's an order!" he said biting her neck and squeezing her breast. He ground himself against her holding her by her hips.

Nyota was shocked at his roughness and pulled away. "You must not be feeling well, captain. Perhaps-"

"I thought you loved me! You teasing bitch!" he snapped,obviously agitated and seemed ready to explode. "You have had me waiting much too long!" He grabbed her arm. "You know you want it, you little hot cunt!"

Nyota was shocked and confused. What was wrong with him? She used all her strength to push him away and he stumbled backwards momentarily losing his balance. She used the time he tried to regain his stance to run out of the door. She ran right into Dr. McCoy.

"Lieutenant! What's wrong." he said noticing how upset she was.

"It's Jim. Something is wrong with him!" She had never seen him act that way before.

"I know" he said. "I think there is an imposter on board. He also attacked Yeoman Rand."

"I have never seen him act like he did. If I hadn't gotten out of there, I know he would have ripped my clothes off!" She buried her face in McCoy's chest.

Bones tried to calm her. "Look, we have security out looking for him right now. I'm going to go back and see if he's still in your quarters." He took out a phaser and placed it on stun.

"I'm going with you." she said.

They returned to her quarters and found the Evil Kirk had left. "Stay inside until I come back for you in a few minutes and take you to the real Kirk." McCoy said after checking to make sure she was alone. "Don't open the door for anyone but me! Understand?"

She nodded unable to speak. She could not believe it. A duplicate, an imposter was on the Enterprise.

Jim was weak. It was very hard for him to make decisions. He wanted to go to Nyota, but his men were on the verge of freezing to death. He didn't know what he was going to do. He looked over at Spock who was watching him and he knew that he was concerned about his mental condition.

Bones then came into his quarters with Nyota. He smiled at her but noticed immediately that she was upset.

"What's wrong?"

Bones looked at him. "It appears your other self tried to rape her."

Jim looked at her and was shocked.

Spock stood up and addressed Nyota. "It appears Lieutenant that there was a transporter malfunction that produced a duplicate of the captain. This duplicate has all of his negative qualities. Without his other half, our captain is becoming weaker. I am only revealing this information to you because your being here with him is only a further distraction for his already weakened mental condition. I am requesting that you return to your duties or to your quarters."

"Now wait a minute, Spock!" McCoy fumed. "That decision is up to the captain and not you."

Kirk held up his hand. "Gentlemen, please. Give the Lieutenant and I a moment alone, please."

Spock nodded "May I remind you, captain of the men-"

"I am aware of the men, Spock. Give us a moment please!" he snapped.

"Very well" Spock said and both he and McCoy exited his quarters.

Jim turned to her, a look of concern on his face. He could not bear the thought of her being afraid of him.

"Nyota, you know that I would never harm you. I am sorry. Did he hurt you?"

"Not really." she said smiling "Your evil self was upset about having to wait two more weeks and called me a teasing bitch. He also left me a little gift." She showed him the bite mark on her neck.

Kirk laughed "Ah, well I must confess that I am anxious. I guess that part of me is just a little more anxious." He kissed the spot where she was bitten.

"Is there anything I can do, Jim." she asked looking at him. Now this was her Jim, not the madman she saw earlier!

"Yes, pray." he said looking serious. "It is getting harder and harder for me to make decisions. Spock is right. I am in a weakened condition. I would prefer if you would only deal with me on a professional level until things return to normal. I have to use all my energy to focus on the problem at hand."

"I understand" she said smiling

"I knew you would." he replied kissing her.

She left his quarters and Jim wondered what in the world he was going to do.

It worked! Kirk stepped off the transporter PADD as one person again. He had held his other self and wondered how things would turn out. It bothered him that a part of himself was like that. He had attacked Rand and almost raped Nyota. He surmised that everyone had a dark side and he was glad that his was back where it belonged.

The captain returned back to the bridge glad to back together in one piece. Rand was watching him. He wasn't exactly sure what to say to her. Their conversation was awkward somewhat, but they got through it. He wondered if Nyota had heard about his other self attacking Rand. She and Janice after all were friends. The evil Kirk was a part of him. Did he secretly want Rand and maybe he just wasn't aware of it? He had always thought her to be beautiful but totally off limits as his Yeoman. What would Nyota think?

He was glad that she was off duty and did not witness the exchange between himself and the Yeoman. He needed time to reflect. He did not know how he would answer her if she pushed the notion that he secretly desired Rand.

The rest of his shift was uneventful. People were still talking about the two Kirks and he knew that the chatter would continue for a while. He took some ribbing from Bones good naturedly, but secretly he was worried about what Nyota thought. He didn't want anything upsetting things this late in the game. They were so close!

He thought about all that happened and he felt that while Rand was a good looking woman, he only wanted Nyota. Would she believe him? He hoped so. What happened to him was an unusual situation. Well he might as well face her and get it over with.

He got up, glad to exit the bridge for a while, nodding to Spock. He needed to see Nyota, and reassure her that things were alright.

Jim was disappointed when he arrived and did not find Nyota at his quarters. She usually stopped by when she knew he was off duty. He wondered if she was angry with him.

He sent her a message requesting her to come to his quarters. He was so tired, he laid across the bed. Being split in two and then put back together was totally exhausting.

He heard her when she entered and got up. She came over to him "Hi Jim. I got your message. Are you alright?"

He looked at her and was relieved. She seemed concerned and not angry.

I'm just tired. I guess being two people and then one again can be a bit exhausting." He studied her face. "You still love me?"

She smiled. "Of course. I was talking to Janice earlier."

He tried not to panic wondering what Rand had told her. He glanced at her warily.

He was quiet for a moment. "Is there something you want to ask me?"  
He didn't want her to think that he was chasing Janice.

"No, not really. I'm just glad you are alright." she said smiling. Seeing her concern filled him with relief.

He led her to the bed and pulled her on top of him. "I don't want you to doubt me now. We've come to far. I always thought Janice was beautiful-"

"I know" she said interrupting him. "However you have always been a perfect gentleman. You don't do crew. See I remember." she said kissing him.

"You are my crew, too" he said smiling at her while his hands began to roam over her body.

"Yes, but I'm a special exception. You've got me for the long haul" She rubbed her body against his.

"I like that."he murmured against her neck.

She felt him grow hard as she lay on top of him. "We can make it, Jim. It's just a couple more weeks, you know."

He sat up and she slid onto the bed. "I know, and I have great plans for us that day. You know both of us are off duty for three whole days. I saw to that. I hope nothing pops up to interrupt us."

She laughed. "Keep your fingers crossed!"

He winked at her. "You can be sure of that!"


	8. Chapter 8 180th Day Khan Interruption

Nyota woke up and stretched. They were on their way to Star Base 12 as Jim had arranged. Today was the last day before their three day planned vacation. Tonight was the night!  
She smiled. Today was the 180th day.

She showered and dressed quickly. Her heart beat rapidly in her chest. She wondered if Jim was on the bridge. She hoped that the day would pass quickly. Today was the beginning of a new life for both of them.

She arrived and immediately went to work trying not to glance over at him and catch his eye. The sooner this day would be over, the better and she decided to attempt to concentrate on the task at hand. Jim smiled at her after he caught her glancing his way and then he returned to his conversation with Spock. She knew that he was as anxious as she was.

She hoped that the day would be an uneventful one.

Jim sat on the bridge and wondered what he was going to do. Khan was demanding that he turn the bridge over to him. He would never do that.  
He looked over at the crew that was on the bridge. He could see the fear and apprehension in their eyes. They were depending on him. He was the captain and he had let them down.

He had gotten them out of tight jams before, and he searched his mind for some gap in Kahn's plan, but he had been thorough! He had to think of something!

Life support systems had been cut off and the oxygen was rapidly depleting. He glanced over at his crew, including his beloved Nyota who lay on the floor. How could this happen? Khan had outsmarted him and he could see no way out. As he recorded in his log, he thought of what the night was supposed to be, their new beginning and now they were on the verge of losing everything. His head was swimming and he felt himself sliding from the captain's chair to the floor.

Nyota looked at the madman Khan as he was trying to convince her and the rest of the crew to come over to his side in his quest to take over the Enterprise. No one budged. No one took him up on his offer. Khan was sadly mistaken. There were no traitors on the Enterprise except Marla. They knew that even though Khan had studied the manuals, he and his henchmen could not navigate the Enterprise on their own. Khan would receive no help from them!

He demanded that Nyota turn the video screen on. She sat in her chair defiant! Where was Jim? She would not help him if it meant giving up her life!

Fear gripped her as she was yanked from her seat and thrown in front of the controls. She would not help them! She glanced over to McCoy who gave her a slight grin of support.

Her mind was racing. What had they done to the captain? Her head flew back as Khan's henchman smacked her hard making her head spin. She glared at him. He would have to do better than that to get _her_ to cooperate!

Marla jumped up to protect Nyota from further abuse. How could she be such a traitor! The viewing screen came on and she gasped. Khan coolly stated that Jim would not die if they came over to his side. Nyota knew he was lying. He could not be trusted! She and the others watched helplessly as the captain struggled in the confines of the chamber. He would not have long before he would die if something wasn't done.

The viewing screen went off and Khan stated coldly that the captain was dead. She felt sick. She could think of no way that Jim could have escaped from the chamber. Her head fell forward on the console unable to believe that he was gone.

Tears filled her eyes. For the last six months she had loved him. She thought about how happy she was that today had finally arrived and now she was filled with pain. Her beloved had been murdered. On the day that was supposed to be her happiest, it was her worst.

Marla, that coward, asked Khan if she could be excused! She hated her. How could she betray all of them? Jim's blood was on her hands! Khan announced that Spock would be the next to die.

She looked at the rest of the crew in the room. They sat there unmoved it appeared by the events. She knew, however, that they too were grieving over the loss of the captain and Spock. She guessed that they all were about to die and were preparing themselves for the worst.

Suddenly gas began to fill the room and fights broke out. She escaped into the corridor coughing. She was shocked to see Jim come running down towards her. He was alive! She was stunned.

He did not look at her as he rushed pass. He was now being the captain and regaining control of his ship. She was just glad that he was alive.

The court marshal for Khan was swift. The decision had been made. She left the meeting when the recording was finished and sent a transmission of the hearing to Starfleet Command. She was supposed to be on her vacation. They were supposed to be together. Nothing had gone as they had planned. She breathed a sigh of relief, however. She was just glad that they were alive and had another chance.

She still had not talked to Jim. He was totally preoccupied with the situation at hand and she did not want to distract him. She went about her duty and ended up working a double shift. She didn't care. She was alive. He was alive. There was always tomorrow. She saw Jim rushing around the ship, barking orders. She knew that he held himself responsible for what happened. She tried to concentrate on the task at hand noticing that he hardly looked her way. She understood. He was still trying to grapple with the situation.

Nyota retired to her quarters exhausted. They were on their way to Ceti Alpha V where Kahn, Marla and the rest were to be deported. She would be glad when they arrived and the nightmare would come to an end. She noticed that Jim was noticeably on edge and she was sure that he too wanted this to be over. She climbed into the bed. She knew that she would be sleeping alone tonight. They would be arriving at Ceti Alpha V in the morning.

As much as she tried, she could not sleep. Her mind kept replaying the events of the day. How close they had come to death kept her preoccupied. She thought about Jim and how she almost lost him, how he ad almost lost his ship. She got up. There was no use lying in bed wide awake even though she was tired. She would return to the bridge and make herself useful by offering to relieve Saunders for her breaks.

Jim was not on the bridge and she was not surprised. Spock, however, was at his station and looked inquiringly at her.

"Lieutenant" he said "It was my understanding that you were off duty for the next three days."

"I know, Spock" she said "I can't sleep. I told Lieutenant Saunders that I would relieve her for her breaks."

"If you are looking for the captain-"

"I am not looking for the captain, Spock" she said interrupting him "I am just trying to make myself useful."

Spock studied her for a moment. "Very well."

Saunders returned from her break and Nyota went to the observation deck which was deserted. She was not ready to return to her empty quarters.  
She stared out in space thinking about all that had happened. She guessed that Jim most likely had gone to his quarters for a brief rest period. She did not want to disturb him. She was sure that the time in the decompression chamber must have taken a toll on him and felt that he needed his rest.

She didn't know how long she sat there and she didn't realize that she had dozed off until an arm shook her gently. She opened her eyes and Jim was looking at her.

"Nyota, I've been looking all over for you. Spock told me that you left the bridge and when I didn't find you at your quarters, I began searching the entire ship for you."

Seeing those hazel eyes full of love and concern overwhelmed her and she started crying. He pulled her into his arms hugging her tightly. She wept uncontrollably, not wanting to let him go.

"Baby, its alright." he said kissing her. 'It's almost over."

"Jim, I though you were dead! Khan-"

"I'm right here. I'm fine, see" he said wiping her face. He smiled. "I guess we're now one day overdue for our vacation. I didn't think anything would be able to keep me from you, but I guess I was wrong. Why don't you go go lie down in your quarters? You're off duty. I have one more task to perform. We are approaching Ceti Alpha V and once Khan and the rest are dropped off, I will come to you."

"Alright Jim" she said.

She got up and walked with him. She didn't have much to say. She was exhausted. She decided that she would take a shower and wait for him. She walked in her quarters and turned to him, giving him a salute. He smiled. "I'll be back before you know it." he said

She put on her bath robe and stretched out on the bed after the relaxing shower. She would relax for a bit and wait for Jim.

When Jim came to her quarters, he found her fast asleep. This was not how their first full day of lovemaking was supposed to turn out. He knew that she was tired and had to admit to himself that he was too.

He stood over the bed and admired her. The robe had come open revealing her perfect breasts as she lay on her side. His eyes traveled down to her navel and then to the thickness of the hair between her thighs. She didn't shave. He liked that. Desire filled him but he looked away. In due time, he said to himself.

He sat down and took off his boots and lay down beside her. She did not stir and he was glad to let her rest. He too, was tired after all that had happened. He closed his eyes and felt sleep overtaking him.

***************

Nyota awoke to Jim's deep breathing, almost to the point of snoring. She was happy, he came to her. The room was dark and she nestled close to him. She could tell that he was fully dressed except for his boots. She sat up on the side of the bed and he woke up immediately.

"Lights twenty five percent" he said.

She looked at him in the dimness of the room.

"You look tired and you're dressed. Why didn't you just undress and get under the covers?" she asked.

"I didn't think I'd go to sleep so quickly." he said smiling "I haven't showered in a couple of days and I don't smell too nice. I didn't want to stink up your bed."

She leaned down taking in his sweaty scent.

"Smells like a man to me" she teased "I think I'd like my sheets smelling like a man."

He pulled her to him. "Well alright. But I'd prefer to shower. If you don't mind, I'll use yours." He kissed her and sat up.

"Help yourself." she said smiling.

She watched as he undressed. Soon he stood before her in all his naked glory. A rush of heat consumed Nyota and she jumped up from the bed.

He headed towards the bathroom but she cut him off. "Not yet."

He looked at her curiously. "What's wrong?"

"I don't want you to shower yet. I want you to shower later." she said running her hands over him.

He looked surprised. "I'd smell better and feel better-"

She buried her face in his chest. "I like the way you smell, all sweaty and sexy. It's not a bad thing. Her fingers traveled over his jawline and moved to his neck.

His arms came around her. "I wish you were a little sweaty too, then" he said his voice low "then we'd be even."

"Oh, I am captain." she said pushing him back towards the bed. "I've been asleep in this thick, hot robe for hours." She let it drop to the floor.

"This is not how I planned things." he protested. "I had silk sheets and  
flowers and-"

"It doesn't matter." she said as he sat on the bed. "All I want is you."

She positioned herself between his legs and kicked the robe aside. She looked down at this man so had come to love so much, this man that she almost lost. "I love you, James Tiberius Kirk, every sweaty, sexy inch of you."

He smiled at her. "I love you too, so very much."

He touched her face which had a bruise from her being hit. Anger and guilt filled him. He thought of what could have happened to her, to all of them.

"I don't ever want to lose you. You are my woman and I want to be the one to protect you. I am sorry about this." he said.

She smiled. " We made it, Jim. I almost lost you, we almost lost each other, but we made it."

She dropped to her knees taking him in her mouth. His scent invaded her senses and her arousal increased. She didn't want to go too far with this, she wanted to feel him inside her. She had waited a long time for this day.

She felt him grab her and pull her up to him. "I can't wait any longer. I want you now." he declared kissing her.

He flipped her over on the bed and positioned himself between her legs entering her with one easy stroke.

"Oh god, oh baby this feels so good!" he exclaimed as he easily possessed her. He had waited a long time for this. His need for her consumed him.

"Yes, talk to me, Jim" she said.

Jim knew that he was being selfish in a way. He need for her though was overtaking him and he felt himself losing all control. He told her again that he loved her and that he needed her. He told her how good she felt to him.

She encouraged him to take all she had, all he wanted and needed and he complied, his strokes became harder and quicker. He knew the end was coming soon..too soon for six months had been a long time for him, but he couldn't help himself. He heard himself cry out her name, all the frustration, anxiety, from all that had happened as well as his love for her came out of him along with his orgasm.

He lay beside her a minute and then looked away. "I'm sorry...I guess I wasn't a very good lover to start off with." he said softly.

She grabbed is face. "You are a very good lover. You have been loving me for the last six months and it has been great."

"But I got carried away. I know you didn't-"

She kissed him cutting him off. "We have all the time in the world. I just wanted to give myself to you, to actually feel you inside of me. That was what I wanted and you gave that to me."

"I'm going to shower now, " he said "with your permission, of course."

She laughed. "I probably could use one myself."

"Oh no you don't. You stay right here."

He got up and went into the bathroom and showered. The shower refreshed and energized him. When he came out, he was surprised how quickly he was aroused again.

He walked over to her and sat on the bed. She had put her robe back on and was watching him.

He opened the robe, his eyes traveling over her. He buried his head between her thighs inhaling deeply. It embarrassed her a little knowing that she was sweaty herself. She pressed her thighs together.

"I have waited six months for this." he whispered. "Now open up, that's an order!"

He grabbed her by the hips, hovering over her on the bed. He placed his knee between her legs attempting to separate them.

"Jim let me freshen up-"

"No." he said gruffly spreading her legs. He enhaled again starting at her navel and working down slowly. She was very wet, a mixture of her arousal and their previous lovemaking. He knew that she was slightly apprehensive about her scent from their lovemaking. He smiled as he realized that she still had a lot to learn about him. He flattened his tongue giving her a lick long and slow. Her scent mixed with their previous lovemaking session intoxicated him and he felt his own arousal increase as his erection throbbed. She began moaning under his searching tongue and her moans amplified his desire for her. She was so wet and so ready, but he wanted this to be good for her. He easily slipped his fingers in her still licking her clit while his fingers were seeking the sensitive spot to drive her over the edge. He found it and her body bucked upward and her orgasm clenched around his fingers. He removed them slipping them in between her cheeks finding the opening there, continuing his long licks.

"God Jim" was all she could say. She could hardly think as his fingers probed her.

"Is this virgin territory?" he asked probing the tight opening.

"Yes" she gasped. God but it felt good, his licking was driving her crazy as well as his finger. She felt another orgasm approaching. It started around his probing finger and spread, her center ached for attention as the orgasm took control. She was surprised at what she was experiencing, her center ached with the need of him even as she was recovering from the orgasm his probing fingers had brought on.

"Please Jim, fuck me, please!" she gasped, her voice begging.

He chuckled in triumph and turned her over on her stomach. He grabbed her from the waist and brought her to her knees. His throbbing member easily slipped into her as she gasped with pleasure.

His strokes were fast and hard and she loved it and told him so. Her encouragement sent him into a frenzy of fast strokes and he threw back his head as he felt the end coming. His fingers dug into her hips as he felt his body stiffen and his release seemed to go on forever. Never before had he felt like this, so whole and complete. He felt as if they were truly one in mind as well as body.

He fell on the bed. "Damn Ny! That was awesome." he said breathing hard grinning at her in total satisfaction.

"You were awesome" she said kissing him.

He pulled her to him and she wiped the sweat from his face. He looked like a little boy who had just won first prize.

"I love you." he said and she knew that it was more than just words.

"Love you too." she said. "Now go to sleep. You know you want to."

He snickered. "Isn't that a no no?"

"You deserve it." she said turning her back to him.

He pulled her close and she listened to the sound of his breathing which deepened within just a few moments.

They had made it. The six month courtship had been successful and challenging and she looked forward to many more challenges that she knew would be a part of their mission aboard the Starship Enterprise.


End file.
